With angels by my side…

This is a new week full of big changes. I am now joining the thousands who are under-employed, or unemployed. My awesome job I’ve held for three years is no longer. The tiny law office of the lawyer I worked for had to close. This was not for financial reasons, but for the purpose of complying with current statutes. In our state, you cannot be a District Judge and a lawyer at the same time. If you are not a lawyer, then you have no need for a personal secretary/assistant. So that leaves me scrambling for a job.

I learned of my fate over a month ago, and promptly started sending out resumes. So far I have applied to be everything from a learning system salesperson, to a legal secretary. After 15 resumes, 2 interviews, and about 7 rejections, I am still looking. I have resigned myself to heading to the Job Service Center in the morning.

I have already updated my online resumes with my state, and have been signing into their website for about 6 weeks now. I keep signing in every few days and follow the links to apply. I am currently employed one hour a week cleaning a business, and work as many home care hours as I possibly can. Unfortunately, there are about 4 different companies vying for accounts in an area that holds about 4,000 people. So my income has, for all intents and purposes, bottomed out. Five hours of work for the whole week. PERIOD.

Something will break through for me. I am determined. I went and consulted a therapist a couple of weeks ago. She told me that if everyone she worked with had as much determination as I do, many of her able-bodied people would not be on state assistance. Now the trick for me is to keep up the momentum.

I have had one amazing interview, but did not get the job. However, I have been contacted by that person and asked if it was okay to circulate my resume among their colleagues.  This gives me hope. If I have my former employer and this senior partner on my side, how can I lose? I feel like I have angels on my side and I have no option but to succeed.

Okay, okay. I am a realist. There may not be job out there for me waiting. Jobs are harder to get and people are holding onto even those that are not as desirable as they used to be. What will I do if I cannot find that perfect job? Yes, I will keep looking. But the realist in me says there is one more option. Throw it out to the universe, and go back to school. I will pursue my dream and go back to school to be a counselor. This is the dream I had when I was a misty-eyed 17 year old looking at college.

I learned in therapy many years ago that I can maintain something for a very short time. So for this day, for the next hour, for the next few minutes, and for the next few seconds, I will be positive. I will go online and look for a job. I will go to the library twice a week when I have to go to work and I will look in all of the local papers for jobs. I will continue to apply for something if I even have a ghost of a chance to get it, not only if it is a slam dunk.

Well, it’s time for me to work on the stories for a couple of anthologies closing in the next few weeks, after throwing another load of laundry in the washer.  With the angels on my side, I am sure to land safely no matter where that may be.

thanks for letting me chatter.


angel e

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