Hard Choices

Monday was a hard day. I am still struggling with my upcoming milestone birthday. miss Pooky kitty was not feeling well last week, so we went for a visit to our fave Dr. Mona, the cat whisperer. Dr Mona and a vet student found crystals in Pooky’s bladder- sort of the human equivalent of kidney stones. New food, antibiotics, and we headed home. Things were going well, or so I believed.
Miss Pook was unresponsive on Monday morning. I called in as soon as Dr Mona’s office opened. by the time we rushed in a few minutes before our allocated time, Miss trash talking, shade throwing Cattitude was listless and lethargic. Frighteningly so. In my heart, I knew. 10 years was all I would get with her.
After an exam, some kind words from Dr Mona, and some serious evaluation about quality of life versus quantity, the decision was made.
Wrapped in my favorite towel, laying in her favorite spot on my chest, I said my goodbye.
My heart is still breaking. I have called for her at least three times today.
I keep turning my attention to all of my other fur kids, who need me. I still feel a loss. Actually, the LOSSES. MOllydog passed from breast cancer in June. Two weeks ago, our elderly adoptee Daisy passed. Now PookyKitty.
I don’t do well with grief. I know I made the right choice to let her have a quality life and a dignified passing.
I still hurt.

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